Six Rules to Make People Like You
Rule 1: Become genuinely interested in other people.
1) "Do this and you will be welcome anywhere."
2) "You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you."
3) "Ask questions to other people, questions that they would enjoy answering."
Focus on being interested not interesting. There is a big difference. Interesting is about you, interested is about them. When you become interested in people, ask questions and allow them to talk, they will love you for it.
Rule 2: Smile
1) "Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, "I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you."
2) "You don't feel like smiling? Then force yourself to smile."
3) "It creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in a business, and is the countersign (witness or indication) of friends."
A smile is a simple gesture that doesn’t cost you money, time, or energy but it can brighten someone’s day, changes the way you feel and make you more approachable.Smiling is attractive and contagious. People around you can’t help but smile when they see a big smile on your face.
Rule 3: Remember names
1) "A man's name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language."
2) "If you don't remember names, you are headed for trouble."
We’ve all been there when you recognize the person but can’t remember their name. It’s awkward, uncomfortable and sometimes embarrassing. We often use the excuse that “I am not good with names,” but if you want to master people, you need to begin to remember names.Develop a system, when you meet someone use their name 3 times in conversation or write their name down in a notebook with some notes about them. Figure out what works for you.
Rule 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
" If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener."
"Remember that the man you are talking to is a hundred times more interested in himself and his wants and his problems than he is in you and your problems.
I love the sage advice that we were given one mouth and two ears for a reason. We need to encourage others to talk and then listen to understand.
Listening is an active process. It is much more than being silent. It involves empathy, which is to walk in someone’s shoes and understanding, which is the ability to relate without judging or fixing.Listening is a skill that is developed with practice and as you master it, people will like you more and more.
Rule 5: Talk in terms of the other man's interest.
"The royal road to a man's heart is to talk to him about the things he treasures most."
People love it when you can talk to them in terms of their interests. They love when you are knowledgeable on subjects they enjoy and can have intelligent conversation about what matters most to them.
That doesn’t mean that you have to be an expert in every category, but being able to talk to people in terms of their interests goes a long way. One way to do this is to study topics of interest before meeting with people. If you know that your business lunch is with a huge baseball fan, then take some time to brush up on your knowledge of the game. This small point may make the biggest difference in how the lunch turns out.
Rule 6: Make the other person feel important--and do it sincerely.
"The desire to be important is the deepest urge in human nature." (John Dewey)"Helping people feel important and appreciated works magic."
Making people feel important can be done in a myriad of ways. You can give a compliment, remember their birthday or a special occasion, recognize them for their skills and contribution or give them a gift.
The key is to make sure you do it sincerely. Your motives must be pure. This is not about giving to get, it is about giving because you care. People read through individuals who are fake and only in it for themselves. If you are going to compliment someone, make it sincere. Look at the good in people and point that out.
This project has showed me that you should leave every person better for having met you.
